Friday, March 26, 2010

She is here!

E. E. is here! 03/22/2010. Gorgeous and lovely. 8lbs, 4 oz, 20 inches long. Transverse to delivery. C-section. Big sister C is over the moon thrilled. Her hardest time was the days we were in hospital. She is happy now everyone is home. Story to follow.

Thursday, March 18, 2010


Thanks for the supportive comments around the potential c-section issue.

No Judgement

If I end up having a c-section, I want no judgement.

I want to know that I tried. I did my research. I assembled my pro-VBAC support team.

I don't want to be so post-partumly sad and disappointed because of the birth like I was with C. It isn't worth it to me. I want to enjoy those early days with baby as best I can.

I want to be proud that I made a choice that worked for me, my body, my family, my baby.

I have no idea what is going to happen... or when, at this point.

I do know that baby will be here soon.

Why is it that for some women this is no big deal and other women will beat themselves up over this?

Monday, March 15, 2010

All about today and a VBAC that might not be.

C saw the cardiologist today. Doctor thought she heard a heart murmur and her 2 year check-uo and referred her. Cardiologist heard/saw nothing but a healthy heart. She had an ultrasound (which was cool) and then declared, "I have a baby in my belly wike you mama."

Then I saw the midwife who palpated my uterus and declared her hunch that the baby is once again breech.

Finally the ultrasound ordered by the OB to check size of baby. Baby is big. Baby is breech, actually transverse, once again. I am 38-ish weeks... the VBAC idea is not looking to good at this point.

But... if I do elect to have a c-section it will be so very different from the c-section I had to have, emergency style, with C. So I wrap my head around it all at the moment and feel pretty calm.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

20 Days

OMG 20 days according to my ticker over there.

Midwives yesterday. All is well. GBS negative. BP good. Baby's heart rate 145 bpm.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Two and a Half Years

C is exactly 2 1/2 years old today.

Friday, March 5, 2010

To VBAC or Not to VBAC

Doula e-mailed me to find out how OB consult went.

Told her I am ranging from "F*** yeah I will have a VBAC" to "Holy S*** just schedule the f***ing c-section."

She suggested we meet to discuss/review/revise the birth plan.

I don't want to be talked into or out of any choice I might have around this.

I told her I am going to sit with my options for now. So, no, to meeting. For now.

In other news, Partner A is off all weekend and gets home from work in a few hours. Little C is having quiet time - like a nap but without the sleep (although sometimes she will sleep). I am going to have a quick little nap now. The sunshine is amazing today.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

OB Consult Part 2

OB consult today.

I am at a point where I am willing to schedule a c-section for my due date.

The baby is big. We know this. Because I went into this pregnancy hoping for VBAC I am being assessed accordingly. OB is not opposed to VBAC. But does have concerns around baby's size and a successful VBAC. He will see me again in 2 weeks, by which time I will have had another growth ultrasound.

I have not been transfered to his care. I am still under the care of the midwifery. Let me say, here and now, the hospital/OB setting is so very different compared to the midwifery experience. Let me say, here and now, I prefer the midwifery model.

In the hospital today I was nothing more than a body. I was asked about my level of education, my marital status, whether I was taking a prenatal class, etc. Does any of this matter. Also, the nurse (not the OB) commented on my weight - how much I've gained. Midwife has never said anything about my weight. I felt as though everyone believed I had no freakin' clue about my body. It was weird. But whatever... I will hug my midwife when I see her next, hahaa.

So yeah that said I'm all like let's just schedule the c-section.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

OB Consult

My midwife wants me to consult with an OB regarding the big baby situation. So tomorrow I have an appointment with an OB. Not sure what to expect. I'm worried that either I am going to find out something is up with the baby health-wise (though my midwife would have told me if this were the case) or that the OB is going to be like: "I must c-section the baby out."

If I have to have another c-section, fine. I mean, I know what it's like - been there, done that. Recovery was rough. Still hurt after 12 weeks from time to time. Even though the incision healed nicely, I had issues. Not a fan of the pain medication, but found it necessary to take in the early days because I was so sore. And now I am imagining recovery from a c-section with a 2 1/2 year old and the various sets of stairs in our house.

I am a good VBAC candidate - so I have been told. And I'd like the opportunity to attempt a VBAC. My midwife and doula are on board and believe it is a possibility.

For me, a big baby is not a reason to have a c-section. This is just me, other people might feel other wise and I am way cool with that.

But what I have learned in the last few years is that ultimately giving birth is pretty unpredictable. It is best to be prepared for whatever happens. So who knows - only time will tell.

I'll post something following the OB consult. Cheers.